| Saturday, June 03, 2006 |
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i'm sorry i haven't updated in a week and caused you all so much worry.. don't worry about me.. it's all okay already.. yeah. really... made it up with my mum last sunday.. basically what she wanted, happened. i was forced to apologize, without understanding why or for what.. and it just seems that she wanted was an apology. i still don't get it though.. what's the point? it's just words.. i'm still a firm believer in "don't say sorry if you don't mean it".. how can i mean it when i say sorry when i don't even know what am i saying it for? does it make any sense to you? cos it doesn't.. at least not to me.. just realized that every other post has me complaining about how tired i am.. marcus is right.. it's obvious how much dragonboat is taking a toll on me.. but i still love it.. love the trainings, love the people, love the sport.. finally got my own paddle and seat pad.. now all i'm short of is my team republic jerseys.. bleahs.. sorry.. wrong info.. i'm not in the team for june 17th.. in the team for singapore dragonboat fest the competition.. *pengz* that's worse.. cos sdb is the single most important event for dragonboaters... whereas 17th june's is just ivp.. like a friendlies among the 5 polys.. will get to see the champs - np - row.. heard they're really damn good.. =X must have faith in rp.. tell me i'm nuts.. i don't believe it.. that i'm jealous of her.. i don't even know her! and i don't know how to ask you about those messages i saw from her.. wtf sia.. sighs.. now i keep wondering if there's really something between us or is that how you behave with every girl? that message from her really changed my day.. guess that's what you get for nosing around in people's hp inboxes.. serves me right, i guess.. if only i hadn't, i wouldn't know.. but like they say, curiosity kills the cat.. it scares me how much i've come to care for you in this 1 and 1/2 weeks.. i care so much for you and i know you do for me too.. at least that much i can tell.. but what's happening today? maybe it's just that we both had not enough sleep.. and are not feeling well.. words seem so curt.. it's either i keep snapping at you or the other way round.... or maybe it's just that i was in a bad mood and i kept taking it out on you... i'm sorry.. i really am.. but it's all i can do to stop thinking about it 24/7.. since when have we become so close? since when did all the nicknames come up? sometimes i get the feeeling we're together but it's just not "official".. other times i wonder if this is how you treat every girl.. maybe i'm just reading too much into things...... just found out today how alike both of us are.. especially when it comes to stubborness.. now i know how you feeel when you ask me to sleeep and i refuse to.. cos the same thing's happening when i ask you to take med today.. stubborness.. and we both hate it when one is scolding the other.. though you deserve it.. the way you keep telling me you've stopped smoking and the next thing i know, you're smoking again cos of stress "over one stupid problem statement". wth lah! that's just a whole load of bullshit. i don't hate you cos you smoke. i get so pissed cos you keep telling me you've stopped and yet everything you do shows me the exact opposite. i don't care how "noble" your reasons are, i just don't want you to lie to me or make excuses. i just want the truth.. sighs.. it always surprises me how easily girls fall for guys. and this time round, i've surprised even myself. imissmysweetbaby.whathappenedtoustoday?=( |
| 'please don't stop the music 4:35 pm |
now playing :
| song of my life. |
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Past the point of no return - no backward glances: the games we've played till now are at an end. Past all thought of "if" or "when" - no use resisting: abandon thought, and let the dream descend . . . |
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| Writer |
| I am an eighteen-year-old student currently attending Republic Polytechnic. I enjoy reading, writing, chilling, intelligence, and sarcasm. My goals in life include being a professional slacker, wasting as much of my time, life and intelligence away, sleeping a minimum of 12 hours everyday, being a successful bum, and maybe, possibly, someone you could bring home to meet mom with. |
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| Tag |
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Free shoutbox @ ShoutMix |
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| Credits |
| This layout was created by Coram Deo. Other credits go to X X and X |
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